Helpful Translation Guide

A few weeks ago, my extended family took a trip downtown. We visited the nativity scene at the US Steel Building, then walked past the Westin William Penn before perusing the animated window scenes at Kaufmann’s.

Nice story, huh?

Except for one thing.

None of those places actually exist.

I take that back — they exist, but not under the names I’ve used. You see, the building hosting the Nativity scene hasn’t been called the US Steel building in about 20 years. The William Penn is not a Westin. And the Kaufmann’s name was reduced to a memory by the Macy’s corporation.

The point here? I’m a Winky. A Winky is a person who calls things by their old names, or who refer to things that no longer exist, like the Winky’s fast food chain. (Tip of the hat to Lisa D for this term.)

So if you’re ever talking to me about local landmarks or points of interest, please refer to this handy Winky-to-Real Life Chart.

If I use this term… I really mean this…
Civic Arena Mellon Arena
Starlake Amphitheatre Post Gazette Pavilion
The Vista The Westin Convention Center
Pizza Outlet Vocelli’s
Y97 Bob FM
The Stadium Probably Heinz Field, but could also be PNC Park
Turnpike exit 3, 4, 5, or 6 Turnpike exits 28, 39, 48, or 57.

Sixth Street Bridge Clemente Bridge
Seventh Street Bridge Warhol Bridge
Ninth Street Bridge Rachel Carson Bridge
Homestead High Level Bridge Homestead Grays Bridge
Kaufmanns Macy’s
Hornes Nobody
US Steel Building I don’t know. It’s like the USX building or UPMC building or something
Hi-Tops bar (by PNC Park) Mullins
KBL Fox Sports Pittsburgh

Do you know any other Winky terms? Please add them to the comments, so that the growing number of Winkies can be understood by people who have only lived in Pittsburgh a few decades..

2 comments to Helpful Translation Guide

  • tom

    Also: If I say “MAC Machine,” I just mean “ATM.”

  • kurt

    hey stan. lisa hipped me to this page – good stuff!

    here are couple more:

    northside = northshore (i think?)

    buhl planetatium = children’s museum

    the decade = cumpie’s? or maybe something else by now; i’ll check at lunchtime one of these days…

    pittsburgh pirates = for sale
    (which leads to:)
    city of champions = sixburgh