Volume Three: The Life and Times of Tom Musial

So yesterday I posted (and tweeted, and status-updated) about how Heinz has started to make ketchup in dippable packets.

I was talking with my wife about how cool it is when you want somebody to invent something and then they do! My life gets better, and all I had to do was nothing.

During our conversation, my wife asked if anything else had been invented during my lifetime that makes my life better. And as I thought about it, I realized that almost everything I ever wanted to be invented has been invented.

For example:

• When I was youth playing Star Wars on the Atari 2600, I wished there was a way to play life-like battle games with (and against) other people, each from our own houses. Done.
• During my Dungeons and Dragons days, I hoped that someday, someone would make a decent Lord of the Rings movie. Done.
• After buying my first stereo component with 24-CD storage, I wished there was a way to store all of my music in one place, create custom playlists, and maybe even take it in my car. Done.
• Whenever I saw somebody on TV that looked familiar, I wished there was a place where I could see a full list of every actor in the world, cross-referenced with every role they’ve ever played. Done
• Anytime my wife started talking to me during a Steelers game, I wished there was a way to pause and rewind live TV. Done.
• When TV was only showing repeats, I wished there was a way to rent a movie without having to go to the video store. Done and done.

And now the ketchup packet thing pretty much completes the list.

All in all, everything that I had ever hoped for in life has already happened. Even the Steelers have won two Super Bowls in the last few years.

Yep. Everything is going better than could ever be imagined.

Except, of course, for those things I have to do myself.

Like get in shape.

Or make more money than I spend

Or become successful at anything at all.

..

..

<Long, introspective pause.>

..

..

 
Hey, my Netflix of Return of the King Special Edition just arrived! See you later! Enjoy the video!

PS. I know. I’m not the first comedian to point out how awesome everything is.

Heinz is producing the dippable ketchup packet that I requested on this site in 2007.

Hooray!

I dig this photo. It makes me look dark and introspective.

I am probably thinking about Twix bars.

Bob’s Kennedy Diner. January 5, 2009.

Here are a couple of jokes that Pittsburghers will enjoy. The other 298 million Americans will have to find some other way to spend their time.

Driving in Pittsburgh / Kennywood Trivia from Tom Musial on Vimeo.

Recorded December 26, 2009 at the Rex Theater on Carson Street.

Come down to The Rex theater the day after Christmas for the best Stand-up in Pittsburgh

Featuring:
Mo Mozuch - Winner of the Pittsburgh Comedy Festival (2009)
Matt Little - SNL/Letterman contributer

Plus:
Ken Barnard
Eric Donaldson
Tom Musial
Joe Kwaczala
John Pridmore
Molly Sharrow
The Comic Dr. Awkward

Hosted by
TJ Amick
$7
Doors open at 8:30
21+

Primanti’s, Moon Township. December 23, 2009.

I’ll be appearing Wednesday night at the Fate Nightclub in a comedy show with local superstars like Mike Wysocki, Gene Collier, Sean Collier, Lisa Dapprich, Patti Emory, Chuck Krieger, JJ Williams, and Jack Fris!

Show time is 8:00. $3 cover.

PS. Fate Nightclub used to be Rosebud. It’s at 1650 Smallman Street.

I’ll be the feature act tonight at Duke’s Station on Library Road in Bethel Park.

8:00 p.m. FREE! Check it out.

This Tuesday, you have the chance to see me in TWO SHOWS at the Brillobox in Lawrenceville.

At 8:00, I’ll be telling a story as part of the MOTH-inspired “For Real For Real” storytelling show, hosted by Tami Dixon and Robert Isenberg. I’ll be telling a true (more or less) story from my misspent youth.

Then, at 9:30, I’ll be hosting the Alternative Comedy Show, featuring Sean Collier and Eric Donaldson.

What a deal!

And if you can’t make it Tuesday, check out Gopher’s Stood Up Comedy show at RPMs rock club in Bridgeville. 8:00 pm. on Wednesday.